When I was a kid and learning how to swim, I went to a different swimming pool one day, and I was terrified to go inside.. I could see other kids swimming and having fun, but there was something that stopped me from going in, and I was (trying hard) giving myself all sorts of reasons:
-I do not know this pool
-maybe the water is very cold
-maybe I will sink
-maybe I will quickly become tired to swim and drown
-maybe if I go in I won’t be able to get out
etc…
As the day went by, I become bored of just sitting outside.. so I got closer to the water.. and jumped in! It was so great!! I went out quickly and jumped in again! And again! And again! Why haven’t I done this earlier?!!
Unfortunately it was the end of the day and I got only a fraction of time to enjoy the pool… after I had wasted so much time…
So I remember: there is a wall of fears that is hard to break. It is everywhere, every time, for anything.
It was the same when you tried to come back with me, I was telling myself that:
-it wouldn’t work anymore
-why try if it failed already
-nothing has changed
-you went away already
-there is no way to fix our marriage
etc…
It is very hard to break a wall of fears. But I have been confident that if you give me one last chance (and with the help of God), I will make you a very happy wife (and you will make me a very happy husband). Because God has joined us, and He did not make a mistake, He can also break our wall of fears! I want my REAL wife, and I do not want to pretend/act with someone else, nor lie to myself anymore, because I really love MY wife. There is only one like her. 代わりが居ない。